What in the heck!!!
So, I might have been in the wrong on some of this.. But, hear me out!
Emilia has swim on Thursday nights. I knew when I signed up that it was going to be a difficult adjustment for her, because typically she is either laying down or asleep by 8 or 8:30 every night. We are strict on bedtime, she needs her sleep and she needs routine. I DID try to sign up for the Sunday morning swim, but it was full. So, here we are Thursdays at 5:50 swimming.
This also happens to be dinner time. So, usually Emilia will have a snack before class. Sometimes, right after she will have a snack in the car. And we rush off to dinner. Typically we have dinner at Foster's Grill or Fire House Subs, they are both pretty quick with food. Foster's is pretty loud, and while Fire House is quiet, there aren't many people in there, so it isn't a big deal that we have a 17 month old with us.
Emilia is pretty well behaved when we go out. She really likes to look around at new faces, interact with the staff, and if fries and tomatoes are involved she is one happy girl. I am not saying that she doesn't ever act up, I am just saying that she enjoys going out.
If you have never had a meal out with a kiddo younger than 3 you may need me to catch you up. So, here you go. Most of the time, Emilia will sit. Like all kids, she is interested in the world around her. She can sometimes get pretty loud. But, young kids eat and then it is time to explore, or get the heck out of Dodge. Now, when you are at home... you kid will take hours to eat. Or mine eats slow.
Tonight was the exception! I wanted to go to another restaurant. I have been wanting Mexican food. So, while I don't really like El Agve, that is where we headed. It took a while to seat us, and while we were over dinner time, I thought that we could make it. I had packed a pouch for Emilia to eat, and we broke up some chips for her. We were doing pretty well, until our food got there. Mike ordered this 3 combo dinner thing, and I ordered shrimp nachos. I forgot that, my nachos didn't come with tomatoes, shredded cheese, and typical nacho things. I was in a panic. Emilia loves to share food with Mike and Me. And I didn't get anything she could share. Mike had some taco meat in his food, and I found some tomatoes and soft chips. So while it took a hot minute to find things for her. We got it done.
But, Emilia got restless. She began to throw food on the floor. And then the squealing started. The first squeal was ok, we redirected her attention to other things, some other snacks, ice... and then another. AND then a look from a lady in the corner. I brushed it off the first time. Thinking that she only looked up because Emilia was loud. Then Emilia dropped her ice cube on the floor... and then she cried. Not her cute cry, her I'm upset and over this cry. And then the eye roll from said lady.
So, by this point I have given up on my dinner. And it is all about making Emilia happy. So I ask Mike to take her out of the high chair, to see if that will make her happy. However, she then wants me. I just wanted to finish my 2nd glass of tea. (I LOVE TEA and have given up Soda till Easter!) So, I have Mike hand me Emilia across the table. I am trying to also finish my tea. But, then her little hand goes into my glass. So, I decide to make her happy I will let her play with my empty ice filled cup. She is a happy camper for a few minutes. And then, tears all over again. By this point the lady in the corner is flat out staring me down. I am praying that out waitress will come back and we can get the check and leave. I am also hoping that Emilia doesn't have another melt down. I quickly try to get Emilia's coat on, and try to rush out the door, without my coat. I did apologize to the family behind us, because Emilia was throwing food in their direction. That lady (who was not giving me harsh looks, said that it was okay and she understood) was nice.
What I should have done and almost did, was point out to the entire room that this lady was giving me looks and rolling her eyes at me. I was trying to feed my tiny human and make her happy. What I should have done was yell at this lady, make a huge mess and walked out. I also should have said something about how bad this lady treated the waitress, even though she had nothing to do with how my child was acting. I didn't do any of these. I walked away with a screaming child and my tail between my legs.
I think that people forget that this tiny human, is just that a tiny human. The world is new to her. Taking her out of her schedule is heart breaking to her. While she LOVES swim, she still wants to be fed and in her bed on time and by 8pm. She is still learning how to do things and behave. And this bull shit of children should be seen and not heard is just that, bull shit. I would also like to know when it became okay to stare at people for their wrong doings? Did social media allow this? If so, I'm out! Seriously. Mike and I didn't touch our phones at all at dinner. We didn't even hand Emilia our phones. And we don't. She knows that they are used to call people. And that is it. But, we don't give them to her at meal time. Not at home not out. We try hard to occupy her time with talk and other things. But, I am sure that if I gave her my phone tonight, the lady would have rolled her eyes at me even more. I am sure that I did nothing right. It's all fine with me. But, it is very rude.
All mom's are just trying to raise good humans. I don't think any mom wants any different. But, we have to stop this shamming. It's not fair, and it is not right. I am sure, that I am guilty of doing it to someone. For, that I feel awful. I'm an asshole. Lesson learned, it fucking sucks. Seriously! Maybe, I should have taken Emilia to the car sooner. But, she wasn't done eating. Maybe I shouldn't have given her ice, but she does like it. Maybe, I should have went to Foster's or Fire House. Lesson learned, stick with what you know. Lots of lessons learned, lots more to come. This mom thing is hard. Hats off to the been there, done that. You should have a medal, gold star, highest honer. All of the above. Now, I'm an hour past my bed time and I am just hoping that there are not too many miss spellings and grammar errors. Peace Out!
